Dirty Pick Up Lines

.Do you run track? Because I heard you Relay want this d*ck.

“Are you a haunted house? I’m going to scream when I’m in b3d.”

“Are you a woodchuck? Because I can see your wood.”

“Are you an exam? Because I have been studying you like crazy.”

“Are you butt dialing? Because I swear that a** is calling me.”

“Are you undressing me with your eyes?!”

“Can you tell me what time you’ll come back to my place, please?”

“Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged”

“Did you fart because you blew me away”

“Did you know my lips are like Skittles and you’re about to taste the rainbow?”

“Do I know you from somewhere? Because I don’t recognize you with your clothes on”

“Do you know karate because your body is kicking”

“Do you know what would look good on you? Me”

“Don’t tell me what to do unless your n*ked.”

“Give me your car keys so I can drive you crazy.”

“Hey baby, you must be a light switch, coz every time I see you, you turn me on”

“Hi, I’m an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus”

“I lost my keys… Can I check your pants?”

“I love my bed but I’d rather be in yours.”

“I want to be the girl/guy who makes you say, ‘My life has changed since I met her/him’.”

“I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle”

“I’m afraid of the dark. Could you sleep with me tonight?”

“I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.”

“I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?”

“If you don’t want to have kids with me, then why don’t we just practice”

“Is you body a map? because I love to travel.”

“Is your a** a library book. Because I want to check you out.”

“Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.”

“Just checked my battery life, it’s at 69%.”

“That’s a nice smile. It’ll look better if it was all you were wearing!”

“The word of the day is legs. Let’s go back to your place and spread the word”

“They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?”

“Wanna go halfsies on a baby?”

“Were you arrested earlier? It’s gotta be illegal to look that good”

“You are just like a snowflake: beautiful, unique and with one touch, you’ll be wet.”

“You are worth every sin.”

“You’re like milk, I just wanna make you part of my complete breakfast”

“You’re the first thing I’m going to do after this lockdown.”

“You’ve been a bad girl. Go to my room”

“Your body is a wonderland, and I want to be Alice”

“Your Daddy must have been a baker, cause you got the nicest set of buns I’ve ever seen”

“Your outfit would look great on my bedroom floor.”

(Look down at your crotch) It’s not just going to suck itself

Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.

Are you a cowgirl? Because I can see you riding me.

Are you a doctor? Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.

Are you a drill sergeant? Because you have my privates standing at attention.

Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you.

Are you a light switch? ‘Cause you turn me on!

Are you a mask? Because I want you on my face.

Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin my dick.

Are you a stack of dirty dishes? ‘Cause I want to get you wet and do you all night long.

Are you a tortilla? Because I want to flip you over and eat you out!

Are you a woodchuck? Because I can see your wood.

Are you an eco-friendly kind of girl? The condom in my pocket goes out of date tomorrow, so why don’t you help me use it?

Are you an elevator? Because I’ll go up and down on you.

Are you an exam? Because I have been studying you like crazy.

Are you butt dialing? Because I swear that a** is calling me.

Are you gay? (No) Wow, me neither, let’s bang

Are you my new boss? Because you just gave me a raise.

Are you the last air bender? ’cause I’d definitely like you bending for me.

Are you undressing me with your eyes?!

As long as I have a face, you’ll have a place to sit.

Baby, I’m like a firefighter, I find ’em hot and leave ’em wet!

Bbrrrr! My hands are cold.

Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

Can I have yours?

Can I read your T-shirt in Braille?

Can I stick them down your pants to warm them up?

Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.

Can you tell me what time you’ll come back to my place, please?

Could you do me a favor? Could you get on your knees and smile like a donut?

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged!

Did you have Lucky Charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!

Did you just come out of the oven? Because you’re hot.

Did you know my lips are like Skittles and you’re about to taste the rainbow?

Did you send the invitation to the party between your legs in the post or do you wanna give it to me in person?

Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert?

Do I have to sign for your package?

Do you believe guys think with their d!ck? (Yeah.) Well, in that case, will you blow my mind?

Do you believe in free love? (No) Then how much for a BJ?

Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

Do you have a nickname? If not can I call you later?

Do you have any room for an extra tongue in your mouth?

Do you have pet insurance? No. That’s too bad because your pussy is going to get pounded tonight.

Do you know your ABC’s? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.

Do you like chicken? Sorry, I haven’t got any, how about a cock?

Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw.

Do you live on a chicken farm? (No) You sure know how to raise cocks

Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.

Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?

Do you want to go on a ate? I’ll give you the D later

Do you work at Home Depot? Because you’re giving me wood.

Don’t let this go to your head, but do you want some?

Fuck me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist right?

Give me your car keys so I can drive you crazy.

Have you got a napkin? You’re making me wet.

Hey baby there’s a party in my pants and you are invited

Hey baby, as long as I have a face, you’ll have a place to sit

Hey girl, I’m a fully-fledged meteorologist and something’s telling me you’re in for a few inches tonight.

Hey I’m looking for a treasure, Can I look around your chest?

Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?

Hi, I’m wasted but this cond*m in my pocket doesn’t have to be.

How do you like your sausage in the morning? Scrambled or blown?

How do you spell “me”? (M-E) You forgot the D (There’s no D in ME) Not yet 😉

How do you want your eggs? Poached, scrambled or fertilized?

I am putting you on my to-do list.

I bet my tongue can beat up your tongue.

I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?

I find your lack of nudity disturbing.

I hear you’ve been a bad boy.

I hope you got a pet insurance, cause tonight I’m gonna destroy that pussy.

I just checked my schedule and I can have you pregnant by Christmas

I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink.

I lost my keys… can I check your pants?

I lost my virg*nity. Can I have yours?

I lost my virginity.

I love my bed but I’d rather be in yours.

I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in?

I promise I’m not like what you’re used to.

I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

I was feeling a little off today, but you definitely turned me on.

I wish I was your phone, so you’d be on me all day.

I would tell you a joke about my penis, but it’s too long.

I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.

I’d love to see you wearing your birthday suit.

I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?

I’m a mind reader and yes I will sleep with you.

I’m afraid of the dark. Could you sleep with me tonight?

I’m having trouble sleeping by myself, can you sleep with me?

I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t come in 30 minutes, the next one is free

I’m no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.

I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.

I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put you between F and CK…

If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

If I told you I had a 2-inch d!ck would you fck me? (No) Good, because mine is 8 inches.

If I told you I work for UPS, would you let me handle your package?

If I’m a pain in your a*s… We can just add more lubricant.

If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?

If you were a squirrel, would you help me bust a nut?

If you’re going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep in until the afternoon.

Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?

Is that a keg in your pants? Because I’d love to tap that a*s.

Is you body a map? because I love to travel.

Is your a** a library book. Because I want to check you out.

Is your last name s*icide? because I want to commit to you.”

Is your name Earl Grey? Because you look like a hot-tea!

Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.

Just checked my battery life, it’s at 69%.

Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity.

Let me unwrap that for you.

Let us let only latex stand between our love

Let’s both be naughty together and save Santa a trip.

Let’s go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply

Let’s play carpenter. First we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.

Look out in the night sky. You see that bright light to the right of that red one? That is a comet that is streaking toward here at 34546 miles per hour. At that rate, it will be here in about an hour. So, wanna fuck?

My bed’s broken, can I sleep in yours?

My body’s got 206 bones.

My d!ck’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?

Now I know why they call it a beaver, because I’m dying for your wood.

One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong?

Pizza is my second favourite thing to eat in bed.

Please don’t let this go to your head, but do you want some?

Screw me if I am wrong, but haven’t we met before?

Sleeping alone is a waste of my sexual talent.

Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.

Tell me your name so I know what to scream tonight.

Tell your bo*bs to stop staring at my eyes.

That dress looks really good on you but, it would look better on my bedroom floor.

That’s a nice smile. It’ll look better if it was all you were wearing!

The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fck you on the floor

There are no seats, can I sit on your face?

Tulips on an organ.

Wanna go halfsies on a baby?

Wanna play carnival? You sit on my face and I guess how much you weigh

Wanna play war? I’ll lay on the ground and you blow the fck outta me

Want to give me another one?

We were both born without clothes.

What has four legs and doesn’t have the most beautiful girl on it? My bed. Want to fix that?

What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

What kind of Uber are you – long or short rides?

What’s better than roses on a piano?

Why pay for a bra when I would gladly hold your boobs up all day for free?

With school, I just want an A. With you, I just want to F.

Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under

You are just like a snowflake: beautiful, unique and with one touch, you’ll be wet.

You are so selfish. You’re going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.

You look great right now. Do you know what else would look great on you? Me!

You must be Medusa because you make me rock hard.

You with all those curves and I’m the car with no breaks… ooohhh -Drake

You work at a post office? Cause I saw you checking out my package.

You’re like Pringles once I pop you, I can’t stop you.

You’re the first thing I’m going to do after this lockdown.

Your ass is so tight I want to crack my nuts on it.

Your body is a Wonderland an I’d like to be Alice

Your body is made up of 70% water. . .and I’m thirsty.

Your legs are like an Oreo Cookie. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle.

Your outfit would look great on my bedroom floor.

Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my p*nis.

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